Wow

Just wow.. No more falling for crap online.. I'm an honest person and caring..
How come I always get trampled on? Story of my life these days:(

I always talk to the ones that get scared of commitment before we even start hanging out.. I'm just as scared as u are don't you know that? I find very few people I can open up to because I've been rejected so much I can't handle it.. :-/ fml sometimes..


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Caring

Never ignore somebody who really cares for you- someday u my realize that you have lost a diamond - while you were busy collecting stones -
Preet

Very wise words I might say.. People are put in your life for a reason, it should be up to you whether or not they stay there..



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Sigh..

honestly have nothing to say.. The past week or so I've been ignored.. Given the cold shoulder and I'm done trying.. I am one of the sweetest most honest people you will ever meet and don't open up to alot of people.. I am sick of being trampled on when I haven't done anything to anyone but show care or concern..
Guess I should know im better off being single and probably should stay that way instead of getting my feelings hurt everytime I try ..
Sigh..


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Can I take back the last two weeks please? I miss my Cali boy and somehow it seems it's very very quiet between us not like it used to be:(
Wish I could rewind it and make it all better..
Don't know what's wrong but hope it changes soon
:-/


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Mic check one two one two?

So I lay here thinking about how many ups and downs I've had in the past week.. Wow all I can say is I hope the next significant other in my life isn't a flake..
I want someone to make me feel special , to tell me I'm beautiful , someone to lay my head on and someone that will be there for me no matter what..
Guess time will tell..
No more texts from me..
Guess u don't miss me that bad.. Truly sad..
Story of my life..



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So for now I am focusing on a job.. Doesn't matter where but to get to where I wanna be and for me to become happier with myself this is what needs to happen.. So send me positive vibes and hope that something will happen soon..
My Cali guy will be there one of these days and soon I'll be able to send smiles his way


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Apologies from me..

Yes I was ignored when I was married.. I am done trying so hard to make people like me.. I deserve better than that..
I'm one of the nicest people you'll ever meet I'm real ,sarcastic,funny and I used to think beautiful.. I'll get back to u on that part since I haven't felt that way in along time now..
I am sorry that sometimes I care too much and am persistent at times but don't shut me out like I don't mean anything to you..
If you want a good friend here I am.. Take it or leave it.. Don't lead me on don't lie to me and pretend I don't exsist the end.


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Don't drink and blog

Yikes! Lol but they do say u do
Speak the truth when your buzzed lol..
Oh well at least I know what I think is real..
Xoxox Cali boy..



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I miss you..

So incubus got the song right by far.. Def love it..
And by far I haven't met or talked to anyone in along time that could make me smile the way you do.. Make me feel special make me feel beautiful.. And I miss everything about you/.
I hope your bad luck changes and you feel like talking more soon because I'm starting to like you more and more every time we talk.. I hope you know how much I'm starting to like you.. And dreaming of one day where I can lay and your arms and smile at you while watching the sunset on the beach ..
Sweet dreams my love I miss you more than you know and hope smiles come your way very very soon xoxo



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undisclosed desires.

Im one of those people that wears my heart on my sleeve, i really wish sometimes that "caring" too much wouldnt come back to bite me in the ass...
I do "fall" pretty easy.. sometimes I trip, but one of these days I hope someone will be there catching me before I fall..
I wanna be the "special" one in someones life.. the one someone cant stop thinking about, the one somebody goes to when they need someone to talk to..
:/ maybe one day..

Bad bad luck

Sometimes I wish I could wave a magic wand and make all my problems just disappear ..
The past year has been really hard for me and it is sometimes really really hard to stay positive when I keep getting pushed down.. I hope someday soon my luck changes and I get to meet the man of my dreams..
And spend my days worrying about where to drive to watch a beautiful sunset..


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Bizarre love triangle

So as I'm laying in bed , I can't get this certain guy out of my head..
Have you ever talked to someone before and shared alot of your life and relieze that maybe you were meant to be..
Besides the distance that lays between you, you share some of the most random things in common, you cant get them out of your head because you seem to grow a bond with them..

The past few days have seem very distant to me dispite our busy lives.. I miss when he said " goodnight love" hope it all comes back so when I do get a job and save some money one of these days we can watch the sunset together ,sharing our blanket on the beach, eating cheese popcorn..

I don't think he knows he makes me smile ..



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Always Kiss me goodnight..

So question from me is.. When is it the right time to say "I love u"? I dont throw around that word too lightly at all.. 

I do know when i find someone again that this time I'll make sure its right when I do say it.. 

I love people for different reasons.. I love them for laughing with me, caring for me, being my best friends,and enjoying life with me.. Im pretty sure "the One" is out there , just have to go surfing through the waves to find him.. ;)

sweet dreams are made of these

It is about the little things in life that makes us happy.. A simple text to say good morning, a smile, a wish, a dream..
For those who think that life is all about money$ and material possessions.. i'd rather live on love and friends than have all the money in the world.... I'd rather work my ass off all day than have stuff handed to me.. because to me that knowing i had to work to buy the stuff i own/possess , if worth way more..
My wish is to be happy, day by day, for the rest of my life.. whatever life has store in for me, you better believe i'll be enjoying every sunset... ;)

Let Love Rule.

So as im drifting off to sleep, i've come to relieze there is another person out there meant for us to be with or be meet.. everyone comes in your  life for a reason.. by far..
So as i lay here wishing to be anywhere but here, i will soon go dream about a happy life with someone new.. All  I can say right now as that im in "awe"..